MaryChristine.Me

It’s been awhile since I last published something here– my apologies.  I won’t bore you with the usual alibis (though I have plenty) and will just dive in directly into today’s rant entry.

Men often think that women are such strange creatures whose actions and words are dictated by mood swings and hormones half the time that they end up with the same stressful pattern of misunderstanding and making up. While it’s true that hormonal changes can affect how sensitive a woman can be– reacting violently to what may appear small or irrelevant (again, at whose point of view is it irrelevant?), shedding tears with just one wrong word or just behaving unreasonably in relationships, there are triggers that you can avoid in order to have a better time with women.

Men as well have “irrational” moments from the point of view of women and this is why it’s probably helpful to know and understand some basic differences between men and women. A good reference would be John Gray’s “Men are from Mars; Women are from Venus.”

But there are a few tips that I know you (I’m talking to men, of course) can use to diffuse a misunderstanding before things turn nasty.

1.  Use positive words when talking to a woman. Men like to joke and tease one another over drinks. They can openly criticize about each other’s physical appearance, clothing, taste in women, body parts, sports skills, etc. that women won’t always take nicely. Unless you’re on the war path with a woman, making negative comments (no matter how truthful they are) about her personality, past, personal stuff, looks, weight (very important!), or anything about her will not sit well with her and can merit a tongue-lashing.   In short, a woman is not a man so don’t treat her like your bros!

2.  Listen to her without judging. Women like to share personal experiences, their feelings, and problems with others.  They expect more sensitivity and empathy from men who are interested in them or who like them. If she feels like talking and you have the time to listen, then don’t interrupt her or cut her short by saying “Okay, so go straight to the point”.  In a hurry or not in the mood to be her sounding board? Then gently tell her “to hold that thought” in the meantime and assure her you’ll be all-ears later when you’re free to talk.

3.  Never ask a woman if she gained weight. Men and women have different views about “what’s healthy” or “fit”.  Women like to appear slim and detest any reference to “weight gain” or “fat” even if she does look better that way. If you notice that your female friend appears different lately, watch your words and refrain from making comments about her weight. Tell her she’s looking good without referring to her weight.

4.  Don’t argue with an angry woman.  The wrath of a woman is legendary. From a sweet gentle lamb, she can fire up in minutes and turn into a fiery dragon. When a woman is at this state, it’s no use arguing with her or meeting her head-on just to defend your case. Instead, give her space and let her know that you’re not engaging her in verbal warfare and return when she has calmed down. After all, it takes two to fight.

5. Never tell a woman to change her profile picture. What she does in her social network is her business– don’t stick your nose in it. If she wants to pose a hundred selfies, let her! If her current profile picture does not sit well with you, bite your tongue!

There you go– just 5 tips for a smoother conversation with women.